Got Happy? Six conversations to have with yourself

How do you see and do joy? Happiness, like beauty, is in the eye of the viewer. Whether it concerns your family, work or hobby, your definition of happiness is unique.

Some are happy, just living and fulfilling their basic needs, such as according to Maslow:

o Food

o Shelter

o Clothing

o Chocolate good idea, no?)

Can money bought happiness? Some seem to think so. However, an increase in chemical levels is not consistent with the increase in happiness. Even lottery in lottery games only announced more happiness in the first six months.

No matter how you define happiness, here are six necessary internal conversations to take with you to help create space for being happy:

1. Define your essence and what happiness means for you. Then evaluate how it relates to your current situation and set goals for positive changes. What will life look like when you reach your goal? Check out often by asking: "Does this make me happy?"

2. Do not compare yourself to Joneses, Smiths, or the soldiers – thank you for what you have. Love what is and count your blessings. Everyone experiences envy and cause insecurity at some point, but do not make it happen. You just put yourself feeling bad. Instead of telling you that you are good enough as you are.

3. Create the moment by celebrating you perfectly. Encourage you to let go. Engage in activities that are rewarding, challenging and it matters your talents. Experience the flow by just enjoying doing, not necessarily a conclusion or achievement.

4. Get out and hold. We all need to belong. Statistics show that people in relationships experience more happiness in life. So have a happy conversation with people who share your opinions, ideals, etc. Build relationships with family, friends, museums and acquaintances. It will make life better and happier.

5. Do not condemn or criticize. It creates a negative lens where you see everything. Promise someone at least once a day. What you put out there come back. When you get angry do not be there. Holding in anger or frustration will most likely harm you more than anyone else. Get a perspective and remind you of your positive change. Be sure that this also goes by.

6. Take responsibility for your own happiness. There is nobody else. Your method of happiness tells you a lot about who you are and how you feel about yourself. As Comedian Al Frank's Stuart Smalley says in the mirror: "You're good enough, smart enough and darn it … people like me!" Sounds corny, but positive confirmation work.

Imagine talking to someone you know. Is this person positive? Are you connected and grateful? Happy to be just around him or her? A small choice you make every day … where you are, what you do, how you choose and what you have … can greatly increase your happiness. So start talking to yourself! You will both be glad you did.

"Most people are as happy as they make it mindful." Abraham Lincoln

© 2006 Crossroads Consulting Group. All rights reserved.


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